So, it’s 5:00 on New Year’s Eve. The last hours of the last day of 2011. And I just can’t figure out where the year has gone. There have certainly been points throughout the year that I really felt like 2011 was the absolute longest ever. GI issues, medical tests, therapies, supplements … it often seemed like it would never end!
But now I’m sitting here thinking about all I didn’t get accomplished and, more importantly, all the wonderful moments that I didn’t want to pass, but have paved the way for the future. Sam having a real conversation, learning his ABCs, writing his name, understanding Christmas. Ben driving. Zach embracing his diet changes. Work challenges and successes. Friendships made and transformed. Experiences broadening horizons that I would have never imagined a year ago.
And I’ve laughed and I’ve cried. I’ve cursed and I’ve prayed. Boy have I prayed. And the sun rose and set each day. And it all brings me here to this magical night, thinking about what the next 366 days (leap year!) will hold. I can’t say I’ve ever been one for New Year’s Resolutions – I’ve never had the desire to set myself up for failure and since 88% of resolutions end in failure (according to the all-knowing AOL), I just didn’t feel the need to test the odds.
I did, however, make a resolution last year to be taller. Yes. Taller. And as ridiculous as it sounds, I haven’t done half bad this year. I’ve found a few pairs of heels that have been nice to me and I’d have to say that for more than half of the year, when you add it all up, I was taller than in 2010.
Thinking of that tonight, sitting here listening to the sounds of the boys upstairs playing and doing their own things, I started wondering what I could try in 2012 that might serve me close to as well as my being taller resolution did last year. Now, in the last week, I’ve had two people ask me and two people email me asking when I was going to blog again. That’s (obviously!) been one of the things that have gone by the wayside in the business of the last few months – but the questions made me think about why I started to do it in the first place.
I don’t know if there’s a soul out there that will read this little entry. I hope so, but I know that even some of my best friends don’t. But, then again, that’s not what matters. As that dear friend I mentioned before so aptly put – writing is cathartic for me. I may not be that good at it. I may not have a ton of readers. I may have to literally schedule time to get words on paper – but I need to do it for me. And hopefully, someday, for Sam and Zach and Ben.
So that’s what brought me to flipping open the laptop and penning a few words while waiting for the boys’ GFCF chicken nuggets to cook. My resolution for 2012 – blog more. Notice how I didn’t put any definitive amount on there? ‘Cause I’m testing the odds just by making one – have to give myself a leg up where I can!
May the New Year bring you all health & happiness … the best things we can have!